Random Thoughts on Friendship

Friends are good. Seriously. They are. People make such a big deal about having friends. It's ok, folks. Relax. Friends come and go. Here today, gone tomorrow. Say something good, have a good day and everyone loves you. Be happy, helpful, funny, and complimentary, you'll have friends. The Bible says to have friends, you must show yourself to be friendly. Wow! That's easy. You mean that's all I have to do to have friends? Cool. I can do that. I can have lots of friends. But I really don't want all that many, to be perfectly honest. Friends generally take a lot of effort! I have to invest time, energy, emotion. By and large, I'll pass.


On the other hand, have a bad day...make that a bad week. No one likes you. No one wants to be around you. No one says, "Can I help?" No one overlooks the fact that you said something out of line or out of character (as they perceive it) for you. Except your friends. I'm not talking about acquaintances. They are the ones who stand back and, honestly, are probably glad you are having it tough for a change.


But your friends...they care. They call and ask how you doing. "Are you doing better?" They take your side when you complain whether they think you brought it on yourself or not. Friends love when you succeed and take offense at your offenders. They pray for you and tell you so.


I've heard it said that you are indeed fortunate to have one or two true friends in a lifetime. To quote our "friend" Frank, "Friends, I've had a few, but then again, too few to mention." I think I've done better than that and am blessed.


Faux friends? Oh, yeah! Had those, too! Pretty sure there are some hanging around now.


I have a group of what might seem like the most unlikely of friends. I would be hard pressed to explain this group except that "opposites attract." We are politically diverse; religiously polarized; totally different careers; but I think we care. We care about each other. We enjoy the times we spend together. We don't talk on the phone, we seldom email, but we all roll out of bed early every couple of weeks and get together. We talk about whatever subject comes up. We don't gossip, much. (We don't know the same people, so gossip's really not as fun as it could be.) But we enjoy the connection we share. I'm not sure what it is, but it gets me out of bed at six o'clock a.m. every other Tuesday. And for them I am thankful. I love these friends.


Then there are my peripheral friends. These come out of nowhere when I need them most. Don't hang out, but have something that pulls us together. These may be business friends, church friends or other friends with whom I have specific niche friendships. I enjoy these friends. I need these friends. I love these friends.


Temporary friends. Those people with whom you have a real and unique attraction and amazing friendship for a short time. And then, its gone. You don't talk or get together anymore. But it wasn't a bad ending, it just ended. And that's ok, too. It was what it was. I loved these friends.


And then, there are soulmates.