Friday, September 25, 2009

Anyone home in New Jersey?

So, I'm driving south and east to North Carolina. I'm cruising along just above the speed limit. Heading down the main highway to the Outerbanks in general and Duck, North Carolina, in particular. I was listening to my CD-of-the-month on various management intelligence ideas and the latest in marketing psychology. Aside from that, this promised to be a fun "girls' weekend" filled with food, adventure and gossip.

So, as I'm driving along completely immersed in this captivating and informational material, I begin to notice that there are a lot of cars that are loaded down with stuff. I'm not talking about just full of people and their belongings--which they were--but literally loaded down. Think Clampetts here. That's what I was thinking. Tops of cars were packed with heaven knows what, covered by blue plastic tarps, clear plastic tarps and by nothing, but all secured with bungee cords. Loose corners of tarps flapped freely in the wind as suitcases threatened to break free and fly directly into the windshield of any vehicle brave enough to follow too closely.

I would not have been terribly surprised to see Granny strapped to the top in her rocking chair. However, there were bicycle racks hanging off the backs of many of these vehicles. Some had three or four bicycles suspended securely, but bouncing precariously.

Thinking of black gold and Texas tea, I did a double take when I saw a New Jersey license plate on one of these loaded SUVs. (Sorry, West Virginia, my first thoughts were of you!)

Then I began to notice that three out of five cars I passed were from New Jersey. What's with that? Why the mass exodus from New Jersey? "Its the beach," I thought. But these people had just driven--what?--four or five hundred miles down the coast past miles and miles of beach to get here. For heaven's sake! They have their own beaches! They call these sandy stretches of oceanfront "the shore," but they are beaches nonetheless.

Arriving at my friend's beautiful resort home, I walked back out to the highway just to verify my premise. "The girls" came out to see what I was doing and they concurred. Something was definitely going on. I don't mean to incite drama here, but what would YOU think?

Conducting an impromptu survey, I began to ask these New Jerseyites, "Why are so many of you here?" This was not the southern hospitality they expected. Obviously. "Ya gotta problem wid it?" "Whatcha lookin' at?" "You never seen anyone from Joisey before?" "Git outta m'face, lady!"

Welcoming them warmly to North Carolina, I suggested that IF I were so inclined, with so many from New Jersey visiting our beaches (Ok, I'm from Virgina, but close to North Carolina) this would be an opportune time for someone predisposed to burglary and larceny to score big time in New Jersey. Apparently few people remained at home there.

Admittedly, even I was surprised when a large group of these visitors looked around at each other and ran for their cars which were last seen heading north at excessive speeds.

I'm shocked I was the only one to think of that!

(FULL DISCLOSURE: Parts of this blog are true.)

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